So this year, I forbade myself to take part in NaNoWriMo.
You're 20k away from the end of your novel. Focus, Catherine!
You have dozens of short stories waiting to be polished and sent off.
You have a writing class on Tuesdays to keep up with.
You have a writing group on Thursdays to keep up with!
But I couldnae resist. Sign me up!
Do you know the only reason I'm embarking on this madness?
Because... I've FINALLY finished my A to Z of Writing Warm-Ups PDF! Remember, back in April, doing the A to Z Blogging Challenge? I wrote 26 blog posts, with warm-ups for each letter of the alphabet.
It included:
26 photo prompts
26 freewriting exercises
26 mind map exercises
79 (I know!) sentence starts
In total, 157 writing prompts. I'm going to use them every day for NaNoWrimo. It's going to be a stream of consciousness novel, so there is no plotting or outlining. It's more of a warm-up for my other writing tasks, with the benefit of obtaining 50% off Scrivener if I reach the 50k (as good a reason as any to sign up, in my opinion).
So, I give you... my Writing Warm-Ups of 2013. Click here to open it and remember to save it on to your computer!
Impatience,
in my view, is one of those painful appendages of any writer. Whether
it spurs a writer on or thrusts them into an abyss of worthlessness
and underachieving despair, it appears to be a very common attribute
amongst us who covet The Novel with our name printed boldly on
the spine.
In
2012, I followed the journeys of writers who churned out three, four,
ten novels at eye-watering speed. Some have later voiced regret at
their haste, wishing they'd taken more time to perfect their work.
Perhaps their growth as a writer enabled them to look back at their
earlier efforts with a more critical, vicious eye. A cruel punishment
for personal progress, you could say, but still a step in the right
direction in my mind. You wouldn't want to look back and say “I
wish I could still write like that”, would you?
In
contrast, I've followed writers who have visibly deteriorated in
their expectations of themselves: who apologise profusely for not
having blogged in a few days, or get defensive about their perceived
lack of progress: who set unrealistic – not to mention public –
deadlines, only to burn out when they fail to reach them. I've been
partial to a bit of that myself in the past; some of my old posts can
only be read through a gap in fingers that cover my eyes with the mortification of it all!
With
the Internet making the lives and journeys of other writers more
accessible, comes the inevitable unfair comparisons. Many a time I've
found myself thinking “look at how much they've accomplished...
I'll never be able to write three books in a year”. Never mind the
fact that I have absolutely no desire to condense my projects in that
way: I automatically see their accomplishment as THE accomplishment.
THE path. The path to what is debatable, but it's a complete path
nonetheless, whilst my path is still being laboriously paved, brick
by brick. I have to make peace with that and be patient.
Another
misery I've fallen victim to is when I read all about how much fun
other writers have: when their characters leap out and take over, and
how these writers are just along for the ride, documenting all their wonderful antics. I smart at these declarations, consumed by
jealousy. It's like going for dinner with the couple who can't stop gazing into one another's eyes, whilst you and your man fizzle with hostility because you've been arguing about who's turn it was to do the dishes earlier.
Don't
get me wrong, I find writing immensely gratifying, but I'm never
sitting there with a big cheeser on my face, falling deeply in love
with these characters I made two chapters ago. Even when I'm writing
my first drafts (which I now know is much more fun than
rewriting/editing), I can't bring myself to gush about them. I grow fond of them, yes, but I'm wise to all their traits, not just the ones that charm me. To really know them is to despise them at times, in the same way your nearest and dearest can piss you right off! I'm sure the
feeling is mutual: at the moment, I'm editing my “Brothers” novel
and the majority of my characters are being a pain in the arse, to be frank. They keep changing things and making things difficult. Perhaps they'd be more co-operative if I
figured out what their great-grandmother's doctor's mother's maiden
name was.
I'm
tempted to list off a bunch of goals for 2013. I like reading other
people's goals and I love making lists. But I can't. I can't even say
I'm 20%, 40%, 60% or even 2% complete on any one of my five
first-draft novels. I have a funny feeling I've made things difficult
for myself in the way I'm going about it all, but I have to make peace with that and be patient. I'm putting in the time and commitment, as well as regularly contributing to my “To Do Better Next Time”
document, so the more mistakes I make, the better. *said through
gritted teeth*
I'm
taking this opportunity to wish all other writers a productive 2013.
If you're as impatient as me, and you feel that you don't really
have a lot to show for 2012, then just tell yourself what I'm telling
myself: Put the work in. It will
all become significant one day, even if it doesn't seem like it now. Be patient.
This
will be my last post for the Insecure Writers Support Group. Aside
from the A to Z Blogging Challenge in April, I will most likely only
be posting once a month from now on, and I don't want to bleat on
about my insecurities in every post. I shall, however, continue to
support and follow the terrific writers of the #IWSG and recommend
any writer to do the same.
To end on a positive note, I'm thrilled to announce that I was shortlisted in the Scottish Book Trust's New Writers Award. I'm honoured to have made an impression as there were so many applicants, and it has given me a nice wee confidence boost to take into the new year!
Take care,
Catherine
x
◦
Patience is the art of concealing your impatience.
Fiona
gazed into the crystal ball, willing it to give her good news. She
watched the psychic's hand roam over the globe; the old lady had a
feather tattoo on her middle finger, which waved and fluttered with
every movement.
“You're
a pretty lady,” the psychic observed, “I sense heartache.”
“Yes.”
Fiona whispered, her heart racing. She'd just broken up with Frank
Fitzgerald that day, after he'd taken that job at McDonald's. She'd
been mortified when she heard. I can't go out with someone who works
there!
“You
will meet someone, very soon. His name starts with J,” she glared at
Fiona, cautious, “you may not have chemistry straight away, but
persevere. This man will make all your dreams come true.”
“My
God, is he rich?” she squeaked, all thoughts of Frank vanished.
The
psychic smiled, but there was sadness in her eyes. “Persevere.”
Fiona
thanked the woman and left, her heart bursting with optimism. As she
approached her beat-up, old car, she began rummaging through her bag
for the keys.
“Excuse
me, do you have change for the parking meter please?” A tall,
gangly man stood in front of her, waving a £5 note. He stank of B.O
and his face was scarred with acne.
Repulsed,
she replied, “I don't, sorry.”
“Thanks
anyway.” he said, folding the note back into his wallet. His drivers
licence poked out from one of the slots, and Fiona's eyes clamped on
it in shock.
“Your
name is... James?”
“Yes.
Do we know each other?” His glassy blue eyes slithered over her
face, looking for recognition. Her flesh crawled.
Persevere.
“Let
me check my car, I may have change in there,” she retrieved coins
from her glove compartment, “here,” she giggled, letting her hand linger in his.
“Thanks!” Blushing, he smiled, flashing his decayed, rotten teeth at her.
As
he turned to leave, she yelped, “Wait! So... what brings you to the
Psychic Centre anyway, are you having a reading?”
“Oh
no,” he laughed, “my Aunt is in there. I said I'd pick her up, but
I'm an hour early!”
“Perfect,”
she gasped. This is fate, “would you like to go for a coffee?”
And
so it began. Coffee turned into a whirlwind romance, and they were
married within three months. They lived in his mother's converted loft,
and he continued to repulse her daily, but she just kept telling
herself: Bide your time. It will pay off in the end.
She
continued this mantra for the next ten years, distracting herself with visions of a fancy house, a fleet of sports cars and all the jewellery she could ever want.
Three
kids and five stone later, she'd resigned herself to the fact the
psychic was wrong. Her husband still only worked part-time at the
local pharmacy, and she still had the same beat-up old car from when
they met.
One
day, James burst into the house, in tears, “My poor Auntie Florence
has died!”
Fiona
feigned sympathy, but she had a good feeling about this. Maybe she
was wealthy. “Florence? I don't recognise that name. Have I met this aunt?”
“She's
the reason we met,” he sniffed, “she was the Aunt I picked up at
the Psychic Centre. She couldn't make the wedding though, she was in Monaco at the time.”
Fiona's
heart raced. It was destiny.
It
was the first open-casket funeral she'd been too. Aunt Florence was
decked out in jewels that sparkled from the entrance to the parlour.
As she got closer, Fiona's excitement diminished. The jewellery was
fake. It was all plastic, costume jewellery.
Then
she noticed the feather.
It
lay still now; etched onto the cold, dead finger of the woman who
promised her a life of riches, ten years previously.
Back at home, Fiona was half-way through her daily bottle of vodka,
when James came off the phone with an announcement to make.
“I've
been offered the assistant team manager's job at McDonald's. Apparently
the last guy won the lottery yesterday. £83 million he won, the
lucky sod! He came from your old area, do you know him? Frank
Fitzgerald?”
The End.
I hope you enjoyed that! :)
Today's F music video is dedicated to Fats Domino. I think this is what Frank would sing to Fiona, don't you?
Since starting this blog, I've failed to maintain any kind of consistency.
I read about bloggers who spend blocks of time compiling posts, to sprinkle throughout the week, and I'm green with envy!
The only thing that's stopped me from doing the same (apart from conviction), is the question: What do I blog about?
As much as I love organisation and structure in my life, I feel weird with the idea of writing just for the sake of it. My blog posts have been somewhat *maybe too* impulsive, written on an impassioned whim.
But I want to blog more frequently, get disciplined and interact with other bloggers.
Where does that leave me?
Well... I've found a nice little challenge, to fix my wee problem.
It's the A to Z April Challenge, 2012. The magic words on their website...
"This
is a great opportunity to discipline yourself, grow as a blogger, and make new
friends – come join us!"
The gist of the challenge is to write every day for 26 days (excluding the last 4 Sundays of the month. Yes, there are 5 Sundays in April this year.), with an alphabetised theme. To quote the website again:
"Using this premise, you would start beginning April First with a topic themed on
something with the letterA, then on April second another topic with the
letter B as the theme, and so on until you finish on April
thirtieth with the theme based on the letter Z. It doesn't even have to be a word--it can be a proper
noun, the letter used as a symbol, or the letter itself. The theme of the day
is the letter scheduled for that day."
I don't mind telling you, I've spent a ridiculous amount of time poring over the lastyearsentries, gleaming inspiration.
I now have a word document splattered with letters, and ideas for each letter. I hope to get as much as possible done before April, so I can spend the month browsing other blog's entries (famous last words... we both know there's a good chance I'll be posting the letter each day in a panic. I'll try not to though).
I don't think it will make me blog every day after that. What I hope to gain from the experience, is the practice of finding subjects to blog about, and the excitement of writing the posts.
It first started in 2010 with 100 bloggers. The next year, there were 1300 bloggers :o I predict a massive turnout this year!
Come join me in the challenge! The sign up list is now open. :)
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